May 08, 2018 by Renee Linnell
I’m sitting outside at a café, drinking a latte and watching the people walk by. I’m supposed to be working on my manuscript, but instead I am in a daze, much preferring to look at the trees and the flowers and the ski mountain than my computer. In front of me is a little tree with a sign on it that says: RECENTLY PLANTED. Sorry, I can’t hold your bike!, and I think of myself. When I first moved here five years ago. Utterly broken. Utterly fragile. Barely able to hold myself up.
Coffee and Love
Apr 23, 2018 by Renee Linnell
But now I’m back and life is so fun again and I realize that my search for God shattered my world, and brought me full circle to the beginning, to the mind of a child, to seeing the world through the eyes of a child, and back to the paradigm that just being alive is amazing, just going through each day is amazing, just holding a warm cup of coffee is amazing. I had to be so broken to understand: It all comes back to this moment…and to love.
Apr 10, 2018 by Renee Linnell
We must believe in Magic. We must believe in Divine Choreography. We must believe in reincarnation and souls that love each other finding each other over and over and over again, otherwise this whole “falling in love with beings that die” would all be just too cruel. And, we must believe in our Inner Knowing. I believe when we are very clear about what we want, when we send the prayer and then release the outcome, we are always answered. Anything can magically enter our lives at any time. We must simply believe.
Smarter, Wiser, Tougher
Mar 27, 2018 by Renee Linnell
A bird just flew into my window. I watched it happen and ran outside to see if he survived. He was sitting on the ground stunned. He didn’t look broken, just in shock. I kept checking on him. He stayed there a long time. His little heart beating visibly through his chest. His little eyes blinking.
Words of Wisdom
Mar 13, 2018 by Renee Linnell
You are a creation of the Divine. You are perfect. You already are, exactly as you are, of incredible worth. You have the power every day to change the things in your life that make you unhappy. Make your life a life of joy. Do not wait, start today.
Finding My Brand
Feb 25, 2018 by Renee Linnell
As women, we are bombarded by messaging that tells us how to be. It becomes so difficult to figure out what is authentic within ourselves. As we get older, it becomes more difficult because we are told by the media that we are no longer attractive, that we have to look 20 to be attractive, and that women have no other value besides beauty. I am so tired of trying to be something besides myself to fit in. I am 44 years old for f*cks sake. I have been through hell and back. I know who I am. And it is only when I compromise that knowing that I feel lost.
Until We Meet Again
Feb 03, 2018 by Renee Linnell
We have no idea how much we heal others simply by healing ourselves. The ripples go out into the world far and wide. When we survive something difficult, anything difficult, everyone that watches us heal can then rely on that strength when life comes along and smashes them.
Loving What Is
Jan 30, 2018 by Renee Linnell
I wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of my cat, Pele, choking. She has asthma and it breaks my heart. I run downstairs and grab her steroid, turn the dispenser one click, and rub a dose of ointment on the inside of her ear. Then I lay down on the bathroom floor next to her, listening to her chough and gasp for air. There is nothing else I can do for her. My mind contorts with fear and I take a deep breath. Now is the time to walk my talk. Now, at 4am, lying on the bathroom floor is the time to really use my spiritual practice.
Jan 10, 2018 by Renee Linnell
My cat, Pele, just brought me a chipmunk. I wasn’t too worried because I have learned they play dead and if I immediately scoop them up with a hand towel I can get them back outside before they become feisty. So, as she walked into the house I ran for the towel. She dropped the chipmunk. I scooped it up. It was warm. Good, I thought, still alive.
I took it outside to my garden and placed it in the grass. I tried to pull the towel out from under it, but couldn’t because its paws were snagged in the fabric so I just left the towel under it. As I did so it looked at me and blinked. You are safe little chipmunk, I thought. Run away, I will keep her distracted. Then I sat down behind my patio furniture, with all the ants, and distracted my cat.
Dec 12, 2017 by Renee Linnell
I sit outside on my patio and notice two orange poppies getting ready to bloom. Yesterday they were tiny green buds, but this morning the green has split and a vibrant orange shines through. As I drink my coffee the orange grows larger and larger until it overtakes the green completely, casting the green casing to the wet ground below. Two crumpled orange flowers emerge. Slowly at first, but then gradually expanding to tiny circles. They stand tall and proud on delicate stems. The bright orange creates such contrast in my garden of mostly yellow and purple and green, and I think how beautiful contrast is, how desperately we need it on this planet, how without diversity we would all be the same. We would be so bored. We would be so boring.
Dec 01, 2017 by Renee Linnell
I realize I am making the transition from girlhood to womanhood. Letting go of beauty as my power source and turning to wisdom instead. This journey has been very difficult for me, so I imagine it must be difficult for other women, as well. I have written a memoir that will be published October 9, 2018, and after spending four years writing that book, and healing from the sledgehammer called Life, I thought I had finally figured out who I was. But now I am being forced to figure out how to present myself, in my author photo and as my brand. It has not been easy. And as I’ve writhed around in the pain of trying to be who I think I need to be to sell my book and gain followers, I suddenly realized what is happening: I am leaving the caterpillar stage and becoming a butterfly. A completely different creature.
Nov 14, 2017 by Renee Linnell
When I was desperate to find God, to find my purpose, I struggled with the dichotomy within me. I yearned for God and was willing to do anything for Freedom. In my journey towards Enlightenment I was willing to abnegate my own core essence when told to do so by my spiritual teachers. I was willing to shut down everything within me that I thought was “unspiritual”. This was incredibly damaging.
I Believe in Divine Purpose
Oct 12, 2017 by Renee Linnell
I believe in Divine Purpose. I believe that your difference is your destiny. I believe in Sacred Wounds. And I believe that everything that has happened to you has happened for you.